Sunday, March 02, 2008

Overheard

I was waiting in front of the movie theater for Em. A white mini-van driven by a woman is stopped in front of the box office with the driver's door open so the woman can talk to a young man standing next to the car. I can clearly hear the woman, but not the young man.

"It's not that i don't like you, but my daughter is 15. It's ILLEGAL for you to date her!"

mumble mumble

"You are 20, she is 15. She's still in school. She needs to grow and learn."

mumble rumble

"You are ready to settle down and start a family, you should find someone your own age for that. She needs to stay in school."

I walk away to give them some privacy, although that was clearly for my comfort as they didn't seem to care.

A minute later the car door slams and the mini-van drives away.

It would be too much to hope for that he might listen to her.

I see Em walking up to the theater. We buy our tickets and go see a dumb romantic comedy together.

34 comments:

jen said...

15 will get you 20. isn't that how the phrase goes?

QT said...

WOW! That is insane. Props to that mamma for making the effort - I hope it worked.

liv said...

wow. that makes me gag. i'll choke the bitch ass 20 year old that so much as sideways glances at my underage Peep.

thailandchani said...

I hope he listens, too! Things are different now. When I was 15, I had a 20 y-o boyfriend but 20 year olds then were not 20 year olds now.

Ortizzle said...

Looks like you saw two movies. So don't you wonder how it will all turn out?

hockamama said...

jeez, you could have gone to walmart if you were in the market for someone else's drama, it seems like there's always something going on with someone in there.

when I was younger, I dated older guys, a couple of them much much too old for me. I would crap a brick if my baby girl followed suit.

speaking of baby girls, aren't they just the best movie buds? I have so much fun with mine, I'll bet y'all do, too

Maggie said...

If he really loved her, he would encourage her to finish school. Kids. They are both kids really, it's just that one is legally old enough to marry without permission. It makes me sad that kids are so in a hurry to change their lives that way without first living a little of their own lives. They need your advice post!

Bob said...

unfortunately I see too much of this around here. which is why there are so many baby-momma's who's moms or grandmoms are raising their babies.

furiousBall said...

holy jeebus. this is why i run every other day, do 100 pushups and 400 crunches a day... so i can kill that 20 year old when he looks at my pumpkin.

Marshamlow said...

I find it curious that the mom was talking to this boy/man and not to her daughter. I am sure that she has probably talked to her daughter until she was blue in the face. But, still the sense that her daughter's future is in the hands and determined by the will of some boy is insane. My daughter is 17 now and I would be upset if she dated a 20 year old, but I would talk to her and reason with her, after all she has a brain-while a 20 year old boy, not so sure about that. Does that strike you as off?

crazymumma said...

But did this lead to a chat with Em?

Sober Briquette said...

I'm sure that 20 year old isn't "ready to settle down and start a family" either. Maybe those words were chosen to scare him off? Maybe the daughter doesn't really want to date him and asked Mom to help her out?

meno said...

jen, i have never heard that one.

qt, i hope so too, but you know how sure you are of everything when you are 15.

liv, word! (My first use of that, and you were here. :) )

chani, what's different about 20 now?

ortizzle, i am not the type to stare and get license plates and such. I do wish i could know, but i won't.

holly, yep, the best movie buds. She puts her head on my shoulder and steals all the popcorn. Which is fine with me.

maggie, maybe i should print it up and hand it out.

bob, there'a much of that around here too. Such a hard cycle to break.

furious, and i will hold him down for you.

marsha, i can't say for sure, but it seemed like it might have been a chance encounter. I don't know if talking to a 15 yo girl who is 'in love', would do any good either.

crazymumma, i told her about it. Her comment was "sad!"

fiwa said...

I hope 15 listened to mama too. What an awful situation.

Cagey said...

Just another great example of how becoming a parent automatically brings out the hypocrite in someone. Namely, me. I will kick my kids' asses if they do half the crap I did. I did date older guys and wow - I am still amazed I came out unhurt. Sigh. I am so scared of my kids becoming teenagers.

Nancy Dancehall said...

Oh lord.

Someone told O that we're lucky we have boys because we only have to keep track of two penises instead of ALL penises.

TTQ said...

oh oopsie my bad, I can't comment. People who live in glass houses can't throw stones. Or walk around naked.

Dianne said...

I got involved with someone much older than me when I was a teen, I remember how I thought I knew it all when of course I knew nothing!

I hope that girl stays in school and I hope the 20 year old realizes he's too young for marriage - with anyone of any age!

Tink said...

He's 20 and ready to start a family? Whoooweee. That situation sounds screwed up by all accounts.

flutter said...

I would kick the shit out of that guy.

tt said...

It's sad that a parent has to have that type of conversation with someone in the first place. It really makes you wonder what happened before and after.
How great that you and Em go see movies together. Wonder if that 'other' Mom ever did that?

pat said...

I gotta hand it to the mom for trying..i hope she was successful!

meno said...

de, that was the one part of the conversation that ALMOST made me turn around and say soemthing like "20? Ready to settle down? Are you crazy?" Who knows what the real situation is. We can only wonder.

fiwa, would you have, at 15? If perhaps any boy had been interested in me at that age, i know i wouldn't.

cagey, i know how you feel, but i did some of that crap because NO ONE was paying attention to what i did.

nancy, ha ha! It only takes one! i like that!

ttq, why not? maybe some of us glass house dwellers could learn something from you.

dianne, i hope so too. But when we were 15 we just KNEW it was true love.

tink, he may think he is, but when i rule the world, no one will be allowed to marry or reproduce until they are 30.

flutter, one thing that struck me was how kind and reasonable the woman sounded. She was not angry, she sounded like she was trying to parent the boy too.

pat, yeah, at least she wasn't just sitting around letting it happen.

Dick said...

I have always known that it was easier to raise boys. Pat's daughter has a 16 YO girl & 14 & 21 YO boys and she has said the boys have never been the worry for her that the girl is. And she isn't a bad kid in any way.

patches said...

I have tremendous respect for parents who are involved in their kids lives and know what is going on in their love lives. Sadly, all parents are not as attentive as you and the other commenters.

How would I know? I'm related to a few breeders who are potential guests for Ricki Lake. I've considered pruning a few limbs off the family tree.

Alli said...

Scary!!!

If they just wait 5-10 years their relationship would then be ok, but there is a HUGE difference between 15 and 20. HUGE!

gross.

Say It said...

What the mom didn't say, instead of engaging this guy in coversation, was that she'd call the police if she saw him with her daughter again.

Can I ask, what does a 20 year old need with a girl in high school?

Say it said...

Okay, now that I said all that adult talk, I just hope my child is much smarter than I was as a teen. I always did like those older boys.

Lynn said...

That mother sounds like she was at the end of her rope. It's so hard when your kids get to an age where it is not longer possible to pack them up and take them home and stop them from playing with the other kids. (especially the ones that are 5 years older and the opposite sex).

What movie did you and Em see?

Diane Mandy said...

Posts like these remind me why I am happy not to be a parent!

Melanie said...

he really should move on to someone his own age.. 15, wow...

Tink said...

30? *Cough* Yeah, I might have a problem with that. ;)

luckyzmom said...

I always told my daughter that I was not afraid to chain her to her bedpost in the basement(at that time she didn't have a bedpost, so I would have had to get her one first). And, as far as the older guys go, well, her father had guns! Kudos to that Mom for speaking up!

TheSnarkiest said...

Yikes! The parking lot is more entertaining than the movie. There is no chance the 20 year old listened. The 15 year old should look for someone more mature.