Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Bitch


I am afraid that i am a bitch.  I am afraid that i don't know how to have a relationship that is not a competition.  It's all i know.

I am going on a trip with a man soon.  I made the flight reservations a month ago and then emailed the itinerary to this man.  A month ago.

Yesterday he texted me to please send him the itinerary.  I thought about this.  Then i deliberately did the following:

1.) I went into my sent mail and forwarded him the previous email that i had sent.
2.) I then texted him that "i just re-sent the itinerary to your email."


WHY?  WHY DID I DO THAT? 

Seriously, i forget stuff sometimes too. Why could i not just have forwarded the fucking original itinerary?  But i just had to make a point of letting him know that he had missed something.

It's all i know.

I don't feel very good about myself right now.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

When I am hurt because others *forget* or just *can’t be bothered to listen* it is better to be direct and express my disappointment succinctly. Yet….after multiple repetitions, I go straight to passive aggressive. I read your post and projected myself into it even though it isn’t about me. Sorry :(

I don’t have much for you, but if you feel bad about the situation it might indicate you are growing. Changing behavior isn’t as simple as ripping off a bandage. Be patient with yourself.

~jaded