Tuesday, February 13, 2007

I love lunch

Those of you with young children think they cramp your "style" with regard to sex. HA!

Little children go to bed at a reasonable hour (well some nights). They don't stay up later than you do and then come wandering over to your room at 10:30 at night looking for fingernail clippers, or some kleenex, or whatever the hell they just have to have at that hour.

They don't usually knock on your CLOSED door. And if they do, they don't have full knowledge of why it took you five minutes to answer the door.

We've had to resort to lunch dates.

She goes to college in a year and a half. I think we'll celebrate in the living room, and the dining room, and the sunroom, and.....

I love my child, you know i do. But, um, teenagers are so damn smart that it's a bit inhibiting, you know?

29 comments:

egan said...

I guess you just have to get more creative. 18 months, begin the countdown now. What will you give her as a graduation present? More batteries?

D_Man said...

So your saying things just get worse?

Susanne said...

That's the beauty when your child has to go to school but you and your husband are working afternoons and evenings. You have a choice between morning and lunch dates. I suppose this will work until he moves out. Hurray!

Toni said...

I totally know what you are talking about! I have a 13 and a 4 year old- I swear the 13 yo NEVER sleeps- really puts a cramp in the love department!

Sober Briquette said...

I guess even if you're the sort of people who enjoy the "danger of discovery" it's not as thrilling if it's your child.

Our years in this house are limited, and one reason is that all of the bedrooms are SO close together.

Bob said...

you could do like we did in the dorms - put a "do not disturb" sign swiped from a hotel on the doorknob when visitors are definitely not wanted.

of course, if you have a smart teenager whose sexual awareness is awakening, and who has been given certain "aides" by a wise and loving mother, could be introduced to the idea that parents still engage in the activity that led to their existence and then be requested to respect their parents' privacy after a certain hour and NOT GO KNOCKING ON CLOSED DOORS - unless the house is on fire. which, of course, it certainly could be behind the closed door.

Anonymous said...

I have a 15-year-old, a 17-year-old and a big dog who doesn't like it when daddy touches mommy. If it happens, it's at 5 o'clock in the morning.

Thailand Gal said...

An interesting insight into a life with kids. LOL


Peace,

~Chani

Maggie said...

Funny. We've been interrupted during 'naptime' by the 10-year-old who was supposed to be at the park sledding with friends. Imagine our surprise when there was a knock on the door. Saturday afternoon trists have been put on hold...

meno said...

egan, i think i will give her a lock to my bedroom door.

d-man, sorry. I can't say it's worse though, just a different kind of inhibition.

susanne, i am not so much a morning person, but a little later in the day is good. Lucky you to have that time together!

toni, mine sleeps from midnight until 6am, and then takes a nap when she gets home from school.

de, not so intrigued by the danger am i. At least our room is across the house.

bob, i thought a closed door was a do not disturb sign, she just ignores it. I think she undrestands in theory that such activity could possibly be occuring, but not intellectually. Which is good and normal.

anon, and a jealous dog! I bet the dog likes to get between you on the couch too.

chani, see what you've missed? If you like i could ship her off to you for a year or so. :)

mrschili said...

Yeah - I can TOTALLY see that coming on MY horizon. I'm lucky, though - my husband works close enough to home that we can also make lunch dates, because we're pretty certain that the diversion of the DVD movie isn't going to last much longer....

Lisa said...

This is so funny! Well, for me, if not for you.
Sorry!

Dick said...

Do you remember the song, "Afternoon Delight" by the Starland Vocal Band? I am finding there are some definate advantages to being my age.

Lynn said...

When I was younger I remember my parents telling me that if their bedroom door was closed that I had to knock and wait to come in... I don't know what I thought was really going on in their bedroom, but ...EWWW... My parents...Gross! LOL

meno said...

maggie, i swear kids have a sixth sense about these things.

mrs.chili, the DVD is a great thing for quite a while isn't it? But once it stops working......

lisa, i'm glad you are amused. Just you wait.

dick, no wonder you are so happy these days. Yes i remember that song, i think they won a grammy for best new artists and then were never heard from again.

lynn, exactly, eww. Ick. *fingers in ears* la la la la

Platypus said...

Hee hee! I don't exactly have that problem much but oh how I sympathise... Roll on college!

liv said...

Yes, I've been blessed with kids who go to bed at 7:30 Eastern and sleep until 8:00 am. Mine was never the sex interruptions, rather it was the lunch break ups. What I would do for an hour lunch with actual food, table service, and intelligent conversation???

Antonia said...

We had a new bed delivered this week: a mammoth 6'6" wide by 7' long.

The good thing is that it's wide enough for two adults, two cats and a baby to sleep in.

The bad thing is that two adults, two cats and a baby sleep in it.

The three little things go in the middle, and Ian and I gaze longingly at each other across a gulf of six beady eyes. We were hoping to celebrate the new bed with a "lunch date", but it's just been too darn crowded.

Ortizzle said...

I kinda like the "do not disturb" sign on the door. If they're old enough to read, they ought to get the message. On the other hand, lunch-time trysts with no possibility of interruption could be the way to go.

mrschili said...

You know what? It just occurred to me - didn't you buy her a vibrator? Perhaps you can just mention that she might want to spend some quality time with it while you spend some quality time with her dad.....

Nancy Dancehall said...

Meno, what the hell is wrong with your memory? The little ones BANG on the closed door, demanding to be let in RIGHT NOW.

And they wander into your room at midnight, wanting you to take them to the bathroom.

Ok, maybe only mine do.

Lunch dates are good. Lunch dates are very good.

Sanjay said...

heh.. you are only limited by your imagination :)

Mama P said...

We haven't had that problem. The good thing about the kids being right next door to us and having wood floors is that we can hear any creaking first as a warning.

meno said...

platypus, doesn't your daughter go to boarding school? That's the answer!

liv, mine used to sleep like that too, many years ago. You'll get your chance at lunch, in a few years. :)

antonia, God lord, that's the biggest bed i ever heard of. I guess that's a hazard of the family bed. I am used to kicking the cats of fthe bed, but i would hesitate to kick the baby off.

ortizzle, lunch is much calmer. :)

mrs.chili, that would be a little to obvious for her. She would claim to need years of counseling after that.

nancy, wow, mine never did that. although for a long time she used to show up at my bedside at 2 in the morning and climb in. I kind of miss that.

sanjay, says the childless one!

mamap, oh good, an early warning system! Like putting a bell on the cat.

Mother of Invention said...

We used to hear our parents all the time as teenagers and would never go near their door because we knew they were so active. We would be so embarassed!
Now, I don't have kids so there's not really a timeslot for us....well, just our own schedules which can be dificult enough!

Bobealia... said...

My Dad and his wife used to "boink" in the room next to mine and didn't seem to care that I was right next door. In fact, sometimes they would announce their intentions. Fek.

patches said...

I know, I'm a day late on this one, but it is too good to pass up.

You just think that you'll be gloating 18 months from now....I wouldn't gloat until either a) She turns in her house key, b) You change the locks. While Missus Chica is childless, Mister Hombre is not....They were interrupted after midnight by the sound of the front door slamming and the click of high heels scampering across the tile floor. It wasn't a big enough hint that they didn't answer the phone or the door... So she just let herself in to print out a job resume?....But conveniently the front door is located eight feet from the entrance to the master suit...

Take away her house key if her college is in driving distance....you never REALLY know.

QT said...

So late on this one, but it did make me laugh! College indeed - just make sure she doesn't decide to live at home.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Laugh-out-loud funny post! I think you should consider yourself lucky that despite all this, you still want to.

I'm still chuckling at the thought of all that celebrating in every room.