Monday, September 24, 2007

Perhaps she'll die

Picture by The Mister

We live near water, so there are lots of spiders. I am not much fond of spiders, but if they stay away from me and don't surprise me, it's okay.


It's starting to get colder here, so the spiders are moving indoors. I have explained my rules about contact to the spiders, but they act like they don't understand.


One of them, a pretty big one, built a web in our sunroom, from the ceiling to the coffee table. The web was at least a foot in diameter. And there she sat, right in the middle of it, waiting.


I mentioned it to the Mister, so that he could carry out his executioner function, but he forgot. Yesterday when i got home, she was still there. I sat on the couch and read a book, about 3 feet away.


I looked up occasionally to make sure that she was not going to leap at me. She sat there so patiently, so still, that i began to feel sorry for her. There was not much chance for her to catch anything inside our sunroom, a last meal as it were. I actually considered trying to go outside a find a gnat or a fly to fling at her web. Why am i feeling sorry for her when the Mister was going to squish her when he got home?

39 comments:

Esereth said...

ohmigod first!!! First!!!

I also have spiders!!

Nothing good to say but FIRST!

Not 48th like usual!!!

TTQ said...

hmmm, you have a heart..

Sober Briquette said...

We used to live at a lake, so now that we're near water again (I'm not sure what quailifies - our pool or the semi-dry stream behind the property?) at least I have not been surprised by the quanity of bugs & critters. What gets me is the variety. And the SIZE. Eeew. I am seeing new (ugly, scary) kinds of spiders on a weekly basis.

Yesterday there was a web stretched all the way acroos the french door that leads out from our kitchen. That's rule number 3: No barring the door! She had to go. The very delicate, intricate web that appeared under my crystal lamp between 8 pm when I went out and 10 pm when I returned was admirable but also unwelcome. I mean, I have been killing myself to clean this place up! I really can't be entertaining webby spiders.

I do often wonder what some of these indoor spiders are living on...but that's a question I really don't want answered.

Mrs. Chili said...

Seriously? Is that the web IN YOUR SUNROOM!?

First of all - cool. Aren't spider webs amazing? Second, I have to agree with your spiders-in-the-house rule. I try to escort them outside (being the lily-livered pacifist that I am) but, if they don't cooperate, the get squished, usually by me. I apologize first, then send them on to their next lives...

Bob said...

I guess it's the ick factor. I let spiders slide, but a roach gets squished immediately with no qualms.

why? I don't know. neither have any awareness of themselves, no intelligence except what is hardwired into them - their spideriness or roachiness - but we do tend to anthropomorphize. Charlotte's Web, Joe's Apartment, etc.

All this to say - I don't know why you feel sorry for "her", but I do too.

thailandchani said...

Too bad she has to be "squished". Think of all that work she did to build her little nest. :)


Peace,

~Chani
http://thailandgal.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

I am SOOOO with you. I am a charter member of the anti-spider league.
urban-urchin (stoopid blogger is not remembering me so i have to comment anon.)

Lynn said...

I have the same feelings towards spiders I don't mind them in my house...just not near my bed. Twelve screams when she sees one, and unfortunately, I've become the excutioner...unless my DH is home, then he takes care of it. I think you are feeling sorry for her because she is the underdog, and you have a big heart.

Daphne said...

I've always wondered why the old lady swallowed a spider...senility? shaman? in need of protein?

I sing that song a lot around my kids. And today, thanks to your title I'll be singing it again...

WNG said...

You each have a job to do in this little drama and she isn't getting to do hers (catch and eat flies). It's one of the reasons that seeing animals in zoos bothers me- they aren't doing what they were created to do. So what if you're planning on killing her later, she should get to live out her last hours productively. It would make me sad...but i'm pretty strange, so...

capacious said...

I've been seeing so many beautiful webs recently and thought about posting one on my blog but never got around to it. Thanks for doing it for me.

I always put spiders I find in our house outside. My brother pointed out to me that putting the spiders outside in the cold weather is not exactly kindness but CERTAIN DEATH. Alas. It makes me feel less heartless.

I recently told the kids about the brown recluse spider that lives around here - hey, they ASKED - and now they are panicked and seeing them EVERYWHERE. I should have kept my mouth shut.

Nancy Dancehall said...

Because you got to know her.

QT said...

That photo is great. I have also tried to inform the web-making populace about these "rules' and they don't seem to care too much.

I also usually escort them outdoors....

Maggie said...

Confession:

I neither escort them outdoors, nor squish them. I get hubby to do the dirty work, OR I run around the house screaming high-pitched pathetic fear wrought screams as I drop boot all over the floor trying desparately to meet target with a frightened and scurrying spider (the word scurrying made my skin crawl). Usually I end up maiming the poor thing before I am finally able to pulverize it to unrecognizable oblivion, after which I tremble and shake and feel nauseated at my perpetration of violence in this world. But hey, the spider broke the rules dammit.

sari said...

I don't like them in the house either. We are lucky, it's never really too cold outside for them here so I can get Mr. Geek to take them out (unless, of course, they're black widows and then they're killed immediately).

Nice web, but I can completely sympathize on the "not in my house". Maybe they'll move...next door?

flutter said...

*runs away screaming*

liv said...

in the house??? down here they are outside...

and i love ttq's observation that you might have a heart.

was there any doubt? :)

egan said...

I kill all spiders inside my own home. Sometimes guests aren't fond of this behavior, but that's their loss. We've had some large red ones in our basement and they're clearly not welcome there.

The way you wrote this entry made me laugh. I guess I'm anti-spider, more so now that we have a little one.

Melanie said...

spiders don't scare me too much, unless they wake me up while I am sleeping, while crawling on me. now the kid is terrified.

because you care. it just might have a soul, and be named charolette.

meno said...

esereth, i'm so proud of you. But what were you doing up at that hour?

ttq, i know, weird huh?

de, those huge ones can run really fast too. I am shuddering just thinking about them. Maybe that spider was trying to catch one of your kids!

mrs.chili, that is not the same web, that one was outdoors (where a proper web should be) and shining in the sun one afternoon, so the Mister took a photo. But the one in the sunroom was that big. Spiders webs are beautiful, almost impossibly so.

bob, ICK is exactly the right word. Little tiny ones don't bother me, but after that..... I feel sorry for any creature that isn't going to succeed, even if it is because of me.

chani, i wish she has picked a better place. Sure, it's warm in the house, but there really aren't enough bugs to keep the spiders alive.

u-u, i wish i were less creeped out by them. I worry about crashing my car if one ever appeared whilst i was driving.

lynn, Yeah, shemade a bad life choice by coming into the house.

wng, i don't like zoos either, they make me really sad.

capacious, i am always tempted to take pictures of the dew-coated webs i see in the mornings. They are such works of art. Too bad there are spiders involved.

miss nancy, you are very perceptive, and exactly right.

qt, i can escort smaller ones, but the big ones just make me scream like an idiot.

maggie, this sounds familiar, very familiar. :)

sari, i like that idea as i don't like our neighbors.

flutter, how brave. :)

liv, i guess she was in doubt. Maybe i should move to a warmer climate. But at least ours die in the winter.

egan, you are such a big strong manly guy. Will you come over next week and take care of the rest of the spiders?

melanie, thanks for that image, i will not be able to sleep tonight. :) Charlotte was cool, i LOVED that book. I read it at night under my covers by the light of my electric blanket contol. I cried when Charlotte died.

meno said...

oops, missed daphne. I love that song and sang it all the time to Em as a child, and sometimes even now.

My Reflecting Pool said...

How fortunate to have a real live spider killer in your home! I try to live by the rule of: If i'm in your world, I will not kill you. If you enter my home all bets are off. Big spider web making spiders usually get vacuumed as I can't stand the squish of them.

Irrelephant said...

*sigh* I need to make occasional forays up there, I guess, to help you with the spiders.

If you're very careful you can usually gentle them onto your hand, where you can escort them back out. That's my usual technique. *grin* (I can hear the squeals already.) And if you can't do that, all you need is a paper cup and a piece of cardboard...cup on one side, cardboard on the other. Makes a nice spider-catch which you can walk outside with, and not risk touching the little dearie.

I like Nancy's take on the reason. Perhaps you know in your heart of hearts that all life is sacred? *smile* Even the many-legged kind.

crazymumma said...

Please go and visit Life of Pie and her sidebar spider count.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

That sounds like reason enough to me.

I prefer banishment to death, and their handiwork is so beautiful.

Maggie said...

I know, I've described this before. I think its comical how heartless I am and how horrified at my own heartlessness I get. Sorry for the repeat.

meno said...

my pool, i hate that squish too. I always scream. Do you think that they might crawl back out of the vaccuum?

irrelephant, you want me to touch a spider? Okay on the little ones, but it's a no-go on the bigger critters.

crazymumma, i will check it out.

hearts, it is beautiful, but it clashes with the decorating style in my sunroom. :)

maggie, i meant it sounded familiar because of MY behavior, not yours.

Maggie said...

LOL - I am such a goon.

peevish said...

Long ago, before we ever met, my husband made a pet of a wolf spider. She had built a web in one of the living room windows in his mother's house, one summer when he was home from college. He loved her, and wouldn't let his mom smush her. He captured flies for her and placed them carefully in her web. While I find this story endearing, as further evidence of his tender-hearted nature, I also get the creeps thinking about it. It is a better person than I who can abide with spiders.

peevish said...

p.s. Gorgeous photo! My compliments to the Mister.

amusing said...

did you offer some curds and whey?

Ortizzle said...

Because she might have been Charlotte.

Mother of Invention said...

I don't know what it is about spiders, maybe the creepy-crawliness of them, but I can't stand them. I used to have to inspect the dead bodies and watch my dad flush them down the toilet before I believed they were no longer a threat.

Schmoopie said...

Z.'s school has clans. He is in the Earth hall and a member of the Spider Clan. He'll be taking a copy of this picture to school tomorrow to show-off her handiwork. :)

meno said...

maggie, yes, you are a goon, and i can say that because i love you.

peevish, and you still married him? No, i can see why. I wish i could emulate him, but i am just not karmically elevated enough. I will pass on your compliments to the Mister. I want him to color the leaf red though. And i had a part in this picture too. But that would be bragging. Not that i'm above that.

ortizzle, you know i don't anthropomorphize that much. It was just that she sat there, so patiently, to no avail.

moi, i wish i could say i don't understand you. But totally do.

schmoopie, The Spider Clan! Perfect. And this picture is perfect as an illustration. The Mister will be thrilled.

Princess in Galoshes said...

I am normally very girly and squeamish about most things, but somehow, I have never been that upset by spiders. I can usually pick them up and throw them outside, where they are much more useful eating flies and mosquitos.

But they are never fun to find in the house... or, say, on your lap while holding a coffee as you drive in to work at 7:00 AM. Hypothetically speaking, if that situation had HYPOTHETICALLY occured, I might have tended towards the shrill "EEEEK" and less cool spider-friendly image I try to project.

-Mrs. Funasaurus

egan said...

Yep, the good thing is you won't have to give me directions to your pad either. A wise cat told me where you live, roughly.

Franki said...

I'm not even reading your post, after seeing that picture.

*quiver*

Susanne said...

You spiders seem to be a lot bigger than ours. We never squish them we just carry them outside. The one that builds a web over the path that everyone entering and leaving the house has to take every day was getting on my nerves though.