Ok, not really Neptune, as it is a lake. Here is a partial list of things that have washed up on our beach:
- Large bits of other people's docks. This happens in the winter when there are storms. We tear these bits of dock apart and use them to roast marshmallows and weenies. We also got our bench for around the firepit this way, but you have to be careful of the nails sticking out the side.
- Fireworks detritus. I hate the 4th of July for this reason. I look around the lake and see literally millions of dollars of fireworks blowing up. I think two things; the first is what good all this money could have done in the world, and two, that i'll be picking up soggy cardboard bits for weeks. I am a curmudgeon. Bah!
- Someone's retainer. I try really hard to picture a scenario in which a retainer ended up on our beach. I bet the someone's parents were pissed.
- Balls; Soccer balls, volleyballs, nerf balls, beach balls, footballs, tennis balls. Oh, and frisbees. If they are in good shape i give them to the Goodwill, otherwise they become landfill.
- Plastic tampon applicators. Ok, so i'm like, out on a boat, and i need to, um, refresh. So i, um, you know, do that. But what to do with my pearlized easy-glide(TM) applicator. I know, i'll throw it overboard when the guys aren't looking. I give those to the Golden Retreiver next door to eat.
- LPC. In our house that stands for little plastic crap. Those toys and things that you have around the house when you have a small child that hurt like bloody hell when you step on them, and are responsible for your child hearing most swear words for the first time. Legos, McDonalds Happy Meal Toys, doll furniture, Transformers, etc.
- Huge plastic blow up rafts and island thingies. We've had three of those this past winter. I wonder why people don't take them inside for the season. They cost a bundle. These are a pain to get rid off.
- Shoes; Zorries, Boat shoes, tennis shoes, water shoes. Never a pair dammit! I give these to the Golden Retreiver next door to eat.
Lest you think it's all garbage, i'll also make a list soon of all the beautiful things i have seen on the beach.
Disclaimer: Of course i am kidding about the dog next door, i would never do that to any animal. I love animals. The kids next door are another matter.