Monday, May 03, 2010

The Human Disaster Report

I organized a function, a "Tea Party" (and thank you to those fuckers for ruining THAT phrase) to thank the former volunteers of the organization i volunteer for.

One of the women i invited is someone i don't really care for, but i figured she would get lost in the crowd and i wouldn't really have to interact with her.

Which was mostly true, but she managed to deepen my dislike of her in 5 seconds. Pretty impressive!

This woman, i'll call her Cynthia, LOVES bad news with almost a sexual excitement. She'll rush up. panting slightly, and say, without even a" hello" first, "Did you hear about **fill in disaster here**?" There's this little gleam of excitement in her eyes.

I find it really unappealing.

Someday, with all the work scientists are doing on brain chemistry and genetics and all that, i wonder if there will be some genetic marker for people who are REALLY FUCKING CLUELESS socially inappropriate.

Something really horrible did happen to someone close to Cynthia, but she made it really hard to respond sympathetically because she seemed so aroused by being able to deliver the news.

Wrong venue, wrong delivery, wrong audience.



furiousBall said...

did you know that Cynthia is the spell checker suggestion for iPhones when you type in c*nt?

Social Grace said...

It is a shame that they tainted an innocent phrase commonly associated with little girls and ruffled dresses, but there was a certain amount of justice when they were proudly referring to themselves as tea baggers.

Even if they were able to isolate the genetic markers, those affected wouldn't believe the test.

Steph said...

Some people's children. Frig.

lu said...

Celebrating other's misfortunes is a sorry sport.

meno said...

furious, oh how i love thee Ball of Furiousness!

social grace, i actually spit my tea out onto myself when i heard them referred to as 'tea baggers.' Oh, the cluelessness!

steph, This woman is at least 70. I don't think she's going to learn.

lu, it is a sorry sport. But this latest was sort of her own misfortune, or rather that of someone near her. It's like she was excited to get attention.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I think c*nt is much better than schadenfreude, (what's with the asterisk, furiousBall?) and also easier to spell if you're not German. I hate people like Cynthia.

nick said...

I wish I knew why some people report disasters with such glee. I think mainly to reassure themselves that their own lives are not going too badly. And to gloat over their own supposed superior life skills. It just makes you wish some mega-disaster would wipe them off the face of the planet.

Gina said...

I had a friend like that - everything was dramatic. She was like the boy who cried wolf though - she went on and on about this stuff until you either became totally immune to the shock value or until you didn't even believe her.

We were friends for many years, but after I had a child, we drifted - basically because I no longer had the time or energy to devote to her that she required.

TaraDharma said...

don't you wish you were a monkey and you could throw shit at her?

meno said...

hearts, yeah, reveling in disaster is just plain creepy.

nick, these are the times when i wish i commanded a Thor-like thunderbolt and could ZOT them down. Wouldn't that be impressive?

gina, i hadn't really thought this through, other than for my own distaste, but you are right, this is just another of the many forms of attention seeking.

tara, hah! I think however that it would be HER shit i was throwing back at her. Great image, you made me smile.

Nancy Dancehall said...

There's a German word for that -- Schadenfreude -- enjoyment derived from the misery of others.

Not very nice people, those.

People who experience Schadenfreude, I mean. I wasn't referring to Germans per se.

Miss you!!!

Andrea Frazer said...

I totally know her!

Wanderlust Scarlett said...

Okay. I've lurked long enough.

Have to comment on this one.

A friend and I were *just* discussing this... I reiterated the common sentiment that unfortunatley, there is no cure for Stupid.

She suggested that there is:

"...systematic genocide based on IQ ratings and other various common sense based tests..."

This concept is something that one of my other friends plans to sign into law the moment he is made President of the U.S.

Cynthia could be the lab rat for that.

Scarlett & Viaggiatore

Maggie said...

Maybe she went to the wrong tea bag party?

I honestly can't remember meeting one of these people. I seriously hope I never do. It seems to border on the sadistic, which is scary.

luckyzmom said...

She must be an unrequited news journalist. Just imagine her with a big press pass stuck to her chest. Sad.

sari said...

I know someone who is ALWAYS the first person to announce that someone famous has died. Always! And with such sympathy and love for their loved ones.

I call her Dr. Death but my sister says that's not nice. It probably isn't.