Thursday, August 24, 2006

Breasts, socks and poop.

The way i pack for a trip drives me crazy. I run around the house and get distracted from one task to another so easily, and then forget what i was doing in the first place. Somehow it all gets done, usually.

I will be gone until Sunday evening. Em and i are walking in the Breast Cancer 3-Day 60 mile thing starting tomorrow morning at 0fuck:30. I am not really looking forward to it as i will be sleeping in a camp with 2000 of my closest friends. When i was bitching to Em about it last night, she told me "once we get there we'll probably have a good time." So who's the parent and who's the child here? Sometimes it's hard to tell. The name of our team is Walking Down Mammary Lane and i did make some cool T-shirts for us all to wear. So, yay, sorta.

My big accomplishment for today was to fish out all of the socks that had fallen behind the washer and the dryer with a bent up clothes hanger. So, i can go to bed tonight with a real feeling of having done something to make the world a better place.

Another beach story for you:
One morning last month at about 6:00 am, i was sleepily looking out of our window from bed, when i saw a man walking along the beach with a pug dog. I see the dog start to assume the "position" so i elbowed the Mister and said something elegant like "That fucker's dog is taking a crap on the beach!"

The Mister leaps out of bed, completely naked, and sticks his head out of the balcony door and yells "CLEAN UP AFTER YOUR DOG!!" to the guy. The guy picks up the dog, who is still pooping, and starts running away. The guy is trailing a stream of poop behind him and the dog is probably going WTF?

My kingdom for a video camera. I still laugh when i think about it. That poor dog is going to need counseling.

So, i'll see you all on Sunday.

10 comments:

Lucia said...

The title of this is priceless! And, it made me really want to read it. (Wait, is that my tongue in my cheek?)

Carolie said...

Thanks for a great laugh first thing in the morning! I needed that! What an hysterical image--that poor little dog squirting pellets of poop while tucked under the fleeing man's arm!

Thanks for visiting my blog, and for commenting! If you visit Japan in the next three years, stop by!

Bobealia... said...

The group name is great. It promotes mammary tests (whatever you call 'em) AND ... breast cancer awareness... No, I really like it. I'm just not good at expressing myself.
The sock thing would give me a sense of accomplishment. The sock thing is why I'm never bored. Always busy. There's always something to do. Something calling to me from behind the dryer or whatever.
The poor dog will need that dog whisperer guy to come and whisper in his ear while he's pooping. Your mister was portrayed by Richard Dreyfuss in that little story (in my mind of course) by the way.
Have fun! I will miss you, but I can't wait to hear all about it when you come back.

urban-urchin said...

That poor dog. I bet he's totally poop shy in public now. I am laughing my ass off.

Anonymous said...

Hey, good luck on the walk. I did the 3 day in Chicago last year and the part I didn't like was packing up in the morning. Other than that, it was fun. Once in a lifetime experience for me though...

I have completely screwed my dog up. He knows I don't like it when he poops on a walk so he tries to hold it in and leaves little bits of poop making a trail on the sidewalk. He's a big dog so there's a lot of it. He only does this with me though, he goes like a normal dog on walks with my husband.

Liz

Lynnea said...

That was the best laugh out loud, almost had me crying then I spotted, mental image of the week. Ok of the year.

Andrea Frazer said...

That dog story? Ha ha ha ha! Combined with your tee shirts and walk news, another title of this post could be "doggie style". But your original is better. Lots of luck. Pictures please! Especially if your daughter ends up carrying you the last few miles, you pooping along the way!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for walking. My Mom is 12 years post BC....yeah! We have a strong family history. Hopefully by the time my daughters are grown we will have found a cure.

The image of your DH leaping out of the bed butt nekked to yell out of the window is too funny!

Elliot said...

I personally don't sleep naked because that just makes me think of the old, crazy sexy days, and I also would not have yelled at the guy because I'm too introverted for that, but if I knew that a dog dive-bombing silhouetted poop would be the result, then, not only would I have yelled, I would have run outside naked and chased the owner, babbling and growling like a madman, my arms waving in the air. A true reality show moment.

meno said...

Thanks for your comments alls y'all.
Glad you got as big a kick as i did from the airborne pooping dog.

Liz, this year we stayed in the same place both nights, so we didn't need to pack up. That was cool in one way, but discouraging in a why did we walk in circles sort of way.

One Tall Momma, Thanks for the encouragment. Both my mom and grandmother have had BC too. So i feel like it's only a matter of time for me.