Wednesday, January 09, 2008

That was fun

Met up with some fellow bloggers last night. Two out-of-towners, and two locals. (Although i guess one of the locals isn't REALLY a blogger as she posts with the infrequency of an ice age.)

I was mostly grateful to them because it got me away from the radio where i would have been subjected to blather about the New Hampshire primary all night. Not that i don't care, but ENOUGH!

Man, i really had a great time. These are some funny, funny people.

A major topic of conversation was one of our waitresses. Eventually we reached consensus, No way were those things real, no way! Of course, then we went on to discuss world peace and shit like that.

I took a few pictures, but they mostly turned out crappy. This is the most beautiful picture i took. (Note the high spoon count.)


At the end of the night, they all sweetly walked me to the bus stop and waited with me until the bus came.

In honor of the event, i would like to tell a penis story. And unlike Scott's, this one is true.

One of the carpenters who worked on our house when we had it remodeled was also part owner of a tattoo/piercing business. And he was a walking advertisment for his trade, as was his wife, a former stripper with a name similar to "Chesty."

He had a piercing on the tip of a body part.
(I believe the piercing is called a "Prince Alb*rt." I could find out but i am not brave or foolish enough to google it.)

After a while he removed this piercing because it was causing some irritation issues for this body part. The ring must have been of a fairly large gauge, because it left a large gauge hole.

Now he has to put his finger over that hole when he pees, so that the pee doesn't dribble out the side.

Aren't body piercings sexy?

54 comments:

Sober Briquette said...

No wonder if you take notice of those secret studies about who washes their hands. Yikes.

On the other hand, you're having way too much fun out there.

flutter said...

I think I just peed my pants. Thanks. Thanks ALOT.

Mrs. Chili said...

Okay - the yummy of the dessert picture? TOTALLY ruined by the closing image. EEEEWWWW!

liv said...

that looks like it was fun...well, not the peeing out of one side of your dick, but most of the evening.

i'm coming to live with you. forever. i will be your wife slave.

fiwa said...

Oooh... that dessert looks so good. It is 3:30, lunch is long gone and dinner is far away. I WANT CHOCOLATE.

Ugh, that piercing story is gross. To each his own, but that's a nasty side effect.

Irrelephant said...

It depends on which direction the piercing went, actually--north/south is one named style, east/west is another. The removal of said adornment and the subsequent...er...difficulties? Holy shite I laughed!

peevish said...

I knew there was a reason I never jumped on that particular trend. It Is Disgusting! What did his poor body ever do to him? Especially that part of his body, which probably made him happy so many times in his past. My parts are precious. I wouldn't want to hurt them so.

egan said...

Now that you're retired you can meet heaps of bloggers. That could be your new profession and eating yummy desserts.

egan said...

It's already so challenging for us men to shoot straight, add a piercing and you've created a recipe for failure.

You love politics as much as Michael Vick.

meno said...

de, yeah, that will teach him to wash those hands. We are having too much fun. When are you coming to visit? You know, in your spare time.

flutter, glad to be of service. :)

mrs.chili. ruined your appitite did i? Good thing i didn't post a picture.

liv, the evening was very fun. I'll make up the guest room bed for you.

fiwa, it was huge and awesome, like a double brownie ice cream whipped cream thing. Yum.

irrelephant, we talked about you, and your radio show. Glad i could make you laugh. *Wondering how you know the orientation thing.*

peevish, I KNOW! I can't imagine what would make anyone think that piercing the most holiest (and tender) of my precious bodily parts would be a good idea.

pat said...

I love the way you share your dessert...I remember back when I had friends; we would go out and each order a dessert...One bite, everyne pass to the left...and so on til yours came back around to you! Friends are fun to share with and I miss mine but can't seem to make new ones here...my fault I am sure, But it is nice you have friends to have fun with...its everything!

Nancy Dancehall said...

Hey...where's my spoon? ;-)

tt said...

Just in the nick of time.......I belly laughed on the p**is story!!See, I knew you'd give me a chuckle when I needed it..
Bravo!

Cheesy said...

I KNEW I should have called in sick and tagged along! But I suppose my thighs are thanking me..Glad you kids had fun!

Gordo said...

What a great night out and a TERRIBLE mental image, meno. Thanks.

Bob said...

see, you're educational as well as entertaining.

Dick said...

I am allergic to having holes poked into me even for shots or blood draws and I sure can't ever believe I'd want any piercing anywhere on my body. Some of those things people do to themselves seem to me would ruin all normal uses of the part. Oh well, maybe it just proves that there are crazy people all over.

Stucco said...

For the record, Scott from Oregon was initially voting "real", but later recanted and blamed his initial assessment on the lighting. Let's just say Pamela Anderson would've stared.

I'm glad we got to meet Scott and Amusing while they were in town. I don't know why Meno didn't ask about piercings at the time. Always the way, eh? Thinking of the perfect thing to say once you are on the bus for home :)

QT said...

I trust you played fair with the sweets- I know how possessive you get of dessert.

That night sounds so fun, and the story, well, not so fun.

SUEB0B said...

I dated someone who designed machines and he was never more baffled than by the Prince Al...he said "Why would you take a perfectly good unit and make it less functional?" Agreed.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Thanks! For! Sharing!!!

meno said...

egan, heaps of bloggers. Yep, that sounds good. I like dogs more than Michael Vick.

pat, like musical chairs, only with dessert. Yum!

nancy, stucco took it.

tt, glad i could amuse you.

cheesy, us kids. Ha. You should have.

gordo, glad to help. :D

bob, things not to do to your body. An object lesson.

dick, i am allergic to any new holes too. But i enjoy the ones i have.

stucco, scott had less chance to study them than you. By the way, in case you didn't know, your wife is a really wonderful person.

qt, i let them have most of it. There were no fights. But it was a close thing.

suebob, heh. good question. Although someone i know, with a nipple piercing says it...um...enhances feelings. Whatever.

hearts, oh, you are welcome! :)

Maggie said...

Ok my brain went somewhere soooooooooo disgusting. As if the Prince Albert and blocking your pee out a hole wasn't disgusting enough, but I was wondering if he has the same problem when you know, he's fulfilling his ecstatic moments. I suppose though in most situations, it would go unnoticed. Blech blech blech.

Tink said...

Ewww! So what happens when he -? *Ahem*

Alli said...

EWWW! Yah, what Tink said. BLEH!

I never did understand how people could peirce their privates. ouchy & ew! AND why do they have to tell &/or show everyone? NO THANKS!

Marsha said...

I can't get over the fact that this guy goes around telling people his story. Glad you had so much fun with your friends.

ms chica said...

Of all things, I thought I might be reading about over breakfast, it never thought a Prince Alb*rt.

So how does a story like that come up, or should I say spill out, in a professional relationship?

furiousBall said...

What the heck causes someone to do that to their penis? I mean seriously. How needy for attention and self inflicted individuality do you need at that point?

Rhea said...

Oh, man. Self-mutilation.

Jodi said...

ok, that's just scary. hilarious. but scary.

Mona Buonanotte said...

I foresee a HUGE increase in Special Plastic Surgery Procedures in the next few years...patching Prince Al holes, and finding a filling for those tribal earlobe weight disasters (I don't really need a hole in each lobe the size of a ripe peach...rilly, I don't.)

Susanne said...

I wanted to write something about how nice that you had such an evening and everything. And then you threw in that story (which is really funny) but I don't quite know how to respond to this.

deb said...

Thank you for making me smile today. And salivating. That dessert looks wonderful.

deb said...

I just had to google prince albert and take a look. Ouch! And thank you for the education.

Andrea said...

LOL! Did he just randomly tell you about not p*ssing straight, or did you inquire? Because I would have inquired (and have)... Seems to be a common side effect.

Thanks for the entertainment! Now my brain is going through all the names similar to "Chesty".

amusing said...

Nancy: The waitress was shortsighted in bringing us only as many spoons as she saw people. She neglected to count your chair, so you know, because I hate chocolate and all [she typed, wiping the smear from the airport chocolate croissant off her face], I dedicated my spoon to you.

(Yeah. Right.)

You Seattleans (? Seattlivians?) thanks for the wonderful, laughter-filled evening! I was so great to meet you!

meno said...

maggie, you are not disgusting, my mind went there pretty much as soon as i heard this story.

tink, i refuse to think too much about it, i might get a visual. TOO LATE!

alli, i understand maybe WHY, but i am just not that brave.

marsha, he told someone who told me. I could never look him in the eye again.

ms. chica, glad to liven up your day. :) He told our contractor, who was a friend, and the contractor told me. The circle of gossip.

furious, i can in no way answer this question as i have no idea.

rhea, interesting that he did it to be sexy huh?

jodi, it is scary, and funny, as long as it's not me.

mona, i bet there already is, just like tattoo removal.

susanne, kind of wipes out the rest of the post doesn't it?

deb, we here at meno's blog are all about being educational.

andrea, i heard it from a third party, who he had told. I doubt VERY MUCH if he woulod have told me.

amausing, Seattlites!

Stucco said...

New product idea- for the Prince-Albert-Gone-Too-Far crowd: Dick Spackle. Got a hot date? Worried that your member will behave like a messy lawn sprinkler (the chk-chk-chk-chk, brrrrrrrr kind)? Then plug up the holes with new Dick Spackle! Limited sanding required, and most skin tones available. From Ronco.

Stucco said...

Oh, and Meno, I have no misgivings that Schmoopie is anything other than the most patient, beautiful, and understanding glutton for punishment that I've ever encountered. How she has put up with me all these years is a complete mystery, but I recognize my good fortune. I was just hoping for a girl who wouldn't press charges :)

TTQ said...

Ok... apparently for those men who do not encounter problems with the said piercing it can bring mega pleasure. But I guess you just have to take the chance to find out how much of a stud makes you a stud.

As for females piercing the tounge..same is apparently true...

Just sayin..

TTQ said...

Oh and for Stucco (how ironic he came up with the spackle idea) Bubbalicious works too and it's handy.

Sienna said...

Dessert looks a sight for sore eyes, self mutilated holey penis'ssssz just put me off a little :) tho' matey!

There are some things I just don't understand.

Here's to bodies with just the right amount of orifices. :-)

Pam

Joan said...

I think that joke needs to be shared with every teenager considering body piercings. The image alone would serve as a great deterrent.

Scott from Oregon said...

If you've ever stood at a urinal and noticed "some guy" staring at your johnson, I think a sideways hole for peeing might come in handy...

meno said...

stucco, quit your job now. You are a marketing genius.

ttq, i guess maybe just wash yer hands when you pee. Or something.

pam, the dessert was excellent. The right amount of orifices are good!

joan, believe me, i have shared this with my teenager.

scott, i will totally think about that the next time i am at a urinal!

Franki said...

bwahHAHAHAHAHAHA! scott's comment made me fall off my chair.

luckyzmom said...

Just last night my husband and I shared a dessert called "Chocolate Vucano" that looked very much like the treat you all shared. Nummo!O

Antonia said...

Prince Albert - Queen Victoria's squeeze - had a new hole put in his nob so he could pop a ring through it, then pull his nob to one side so it wouldn't make itself obvious through the kind of trousers he had to wear in those days.

Seems an extreme thing to do. He could have worn tight knickers. Oh, no he couldn't, what with his nuts to think of. So there you go.

No idea why anyone would do it these days. I suppose it's a novel place to hang a Christmas decoration. 101 Uses For a Prince Albert. I sense a gap in the book market.

Schmoopie said...

Meno, you are one seriously funny chick! We had a great time getting together with you, Oregon and Amusing. It was great to have Pants there too, but she was awfully quiet ;)

Piercings can be a lot of fun (if you have a good imagination.) My question is this- Do they pierce it when flacid? It seems to me that it would not remain flacid for long. Just trying to work it all out.

Bobealia... said...

Because of Antonia's story about Prince Albert and his need to "tame" his schlong, I had to Wiki it, and it might be an urban legend according to the "History and Culture" in Wiki.
I had a boyfriend once who'd had it. He had a scar, but no hole through which pee came out. My guess is that your carpenter had ripped his out... somehow.

Lynn said...

At the beach I have seen men with their nipples pierced. I wonder what happens if a woman pierces her nipples and then decides to breastfeed...

As for the Prince Albert...owwwwww!

meno said...

franki, scott's a funny guy.

luckyzmom, this one was more of a brownie sandwich. But ut was yummy too.

antonia, you are a fountain of information, useful information. Will it be a picture book?

schmoopie, but if they pierced it while not-flaccid, wouldn't it become flaccid? I mean, that's gotta hurt!

bo, i actually wiki'd it last night too because my daughter and i were arguing over the exact placement. You will be glad to know that i was right!

lynn, i knew one woman who had her nipples pierced. She just had to remove the piercings and then she could breastfeed. Don't know if it ever causes problems though.

Cheesy said...

Dick Spackle... LMFAO...Priceless

Melanie said...

tattoos are worse. imho. that's hilarious. whats even more hilarious is that you knew about it.

I think dick spakle should be marketed as dickle spak. just sayin.