Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Now it is August

If i don't let anyone know how afraid i am, will that make it less true?

My start up friend, Cari, who i mentioned a few weeks ago when we went hiking, was diagnosed with cancer a few days after our hike. For the second time.  She has already started chemo and will be losing all her hair, again.  She's scared too.

Life moves on, without regard to our individual trials.


I just assisted Em in moving into an apartment for her senior year of college.  Can you imagine?  Now i am in a cheap hotel room (there is no other kind in this tiny town) watching re-runs on TV while i wait to fly home tomorrow.  It's both lonely and kind of nice.  I won't see her again until Thanksgiving.


Lynnea said...

What you say about life moving on is so true, so true. There are times when it seems like I'm not actually living so much as riding the wave.

I think telling someone how scared you are actually diminishes the fear, but that's me.

Mrs. Chili said...

Re your opening question - I think the answer is "kinda, yeah." You know that adage, "Fake it 'till you make it"? I think there's a grain of truth in it. Of course, faking is just that - faking - but if you're able to inhabit a place that you want to reach, even if you're not genuinely there yet, you'll at least get a feel for what being there is like. I know it works for me in places where I'm nervous or insecure, but I also know it's much harder when I'm moving from a place of fear or sorrow.

If you believe you can, you can. If you believe you can't, you can't. Either way, you're right.

Anonymous said...

Life goes on regardless of how we feel.

Sending a hug woman.

Cagey (Kelli Oliver George) said...

What's that saying? Just keep swimming?


Hang in there, Meno!

nick said...

I guess life is scary for all of us, whatever our circumstances. Things that seem rock-solid can be swept away in a moment. We just have to find the courage to move on, hard though that is.

Is Cari still as bitter about her husband and the separation?

De said...

In this modern age, hardly anyone is too far away to keep in touch. What I find slightly scary is that I remember when Em was in high school. How can she be a senior already?

Sorry to hear about Cari. I think it would be worse to know what you're in for re: these tough treatments.

luckyzmom said...

No and no.

jaded said...

Life doesn't really give a shit about whether or not we are struggling… luckily our friends care.

Wow…senior year. That means I'm how many old? (starts counting on wine corks)

Wishing your friend Cari strength.

Taradharma said...

the cosmos seems to save up momentous events, and deliver them to us all at once. hehe! just a lil' cosmic tomfoolery.

Congratuations on getting Em moved it - you have the joined the club of all those moms who have gone before you in separating from their children--fun, scary, everything above.

As to your friend's cancer: I hope she gets good care and has good experiences with her medical team -- that sure can make a big difference. Sending her my best wishes.

lu said...

The amazing thing about being forced to push past fears is finding out that that thing we fear is really not so daunting. It's like the wizard - just an old man behind a curtain.

Cancer, the thought of being alone, financial concerns...these things are real, harrowing, but after freaking out for as long as it takes, you push past to the next thing.

Love and Light,

Dick said...

I agree with others that it doesn't seem possible that Em is already a college senior. Time does indeed seem to move faster as we get older.

We also have a good friend who is fighting leukemia. We thought it had been beat after a bone marrow transplant a couple of years ago but it now is back again. I hope they will both do well through those challenging treatments.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I'm very sorry about your friend Cari. What she is going through is one of the scariest things possible.

As for your philosophical question, I'll let you know as soon as I figure out if the tree really fell. It may take a while.