Passive-Aggressive or Projecting?
The Mister and i were paying a neighborly visit to the couple next door, chatting about this 'n that, shootin' the shit, flappin' the lips.
This couple is about 20 years older than The Mister and me and Mr. Neighbor has lived in this neighborhood on and off for 60 years. So they have very definite ideas about what is and is not okay around here.
They were showing us the new patio they just had built. It's along the side of their house that faces ours.
There is a large cedar tree/bush that according to Mrs. Neighbor, their patio designer dude wanted them to remove. "You're really glad that i didn't let them remove it though," declared Mrs. Neighbor.
"Oh, it wouldn't have bothered me if you took the tree out. You should do what you want," replied i.
"OH NO," she insisted loudly, "YOU ARE REALLY GLAD THAT WE LEFT IT THERE. YOU REALLY WOULDN'T WANT THAT TREE GONE." Then she gave a long list of reasons why i was glad. Pretty selfless of her to sacrifice like that for our happiness.
Well, okay then, i guess i'm glad. I mean, she would know, right?
(I admit that we made gentle fun of her later.)
Last Sunday morning i tried this tactic on The Mister. "You would really like it if i had a nice cup of tea and the newspaper, " i said.
"Nice try," he replied.
Rats!
32 comments:
well at least you tried. you know learning from the wiser generations - using your new skills. he does want you to grow doesn't he? LOL
don't you just love when people get louder to make their point, as though you just hadn't heard them right the first time.
I kept thinking she was going to say that her mister sun bathes in the nude and that tree was your only defense against such a sight.
So, uh, why WERE you glad? Do she and her mister sit on the patio in the nude or something? ;)
does my mother live next to you?
Maybe Mr. Neighbor wanted it cut down too, and Mrs. Neighbor used you as an excuse not to have it removed? "Oh, they told me they want it left there because..."
She probably would have elbowed you in the ribs if you'd been closer.
that sounded odd. why are you supposed to be glad? I like the idea that they sit there nude
I wish I had redwoods between me and one of the neighbors!
Men just don't get it do they? He really would want you to have that tea, and here's the kicker..YOU WOULD PLAY NICE all day for that simple gesture.
Honey did the cold soda bottle on the nape of my neck while I was typing. Not cool. I counted to 50 and started plotting my revenge.
Good thing I know the saying "You can't make me angry", but that doesn't stop me from paybacks.
maggie, WHAT? I didn't hear you the first time.
marsha, that reason would have made me glad. Not a thing i want to see.
fiwa, you are not the firts to suggest this. I shudder at the thought.
ms. chica, why yes, she does.
nancy, i think Mr. Neighbor didn't care. But Mrs. Neighbor certainly did.
dianne, i am glad because i wouldn't want to be able to see them barbequeing. My eyes, my eyes!
how about passive aggressive projecting? :p
Now if it was me, I'd've said "You're really glad I stopped doing that thing that dogs do where they scoot along the floor to grind their assholes on the carpet like it's toilet paper".
omg, stucco! that would make me run back inside everytime I saw one of them outside *subtle reference to emmet and hyacinth*
you know, maybe the tree will provide cover, if you happen to see them before they see you...
This would REALLY make me wonder exactly what this couple is doing out there? Is that where their pot plants are growing or what?
Nice try on the tea. I give you an A for effort.
I will assimilate that tactic into my arsenal of weaponry.
Girl after my own heart. :-) These things take training, I definitely think you should try again. You would like it if I had a sapphire bracelette..
Well, you tried. It would be interesting to hear why she thought you REALLY didn't want that tree cut down, though. Maybe most commenters here are right!
that was a good chuckle....so are you reallllly glad or just a little glad....
cute neighbors....nudists by any chance??? Maybe his patio is his nekkid-room?
{{{shuddering}}}
ttq, there are many mornings that he brings me tea. We were just continuing making fun of Mrs. Neighbor.
flutter, there you have it exactly.
stucco, you always go right for the vulgar. I like that in a person.
holly, so i can run, run away?
qt, they just want their privacy, as one corner of our house overlooks theirs.
crazymumma, let me know how it works.
princess, great idea. i like sapphires.
dick, god, i hope not! No, they just are very sensitive to the balance of privacy.
tt, not cute. no nudity, please!
There's definitely something to be said for knowing one's neighbours. I'm constantly amazed at people that I know that don't know the people who live around them. I couldn't live like that.
Excellent try on the tea. :-)
It's funny how people do that and don't notice.
Ha, your one sentence to your Mr. is way too gentle. You could probably continue with a few more sentences, all starting with "you" and ending with a preposition "me" to make him feel guilty!
Hhhmm, in fact, I'm going to try that and see if it works! :)
Yep, they're secretly nudists. Or they like to act out "Cop/Prostitute" fantasies in full costume.
more importantly, Mona, maybe if meno were a nudist her trick might have worked, no?
Everyone would really like it if I won the lotto, right? ;)
You are really glad I commented on your post!
Well, I am glad. I like cedars...
even though they aren't real cedars...
unless of course it is a real cedar...
which isn't likely...
more likely a false cedar...
but I'm still glad.
Seems like she was trying to tell you something.
Perhaps she knows about the corpses?
I am inclined to agree with the nekkid thinkers. What more could you want from good neighbors??
GOD AM I GLAD SHE LEFT THAT TREE THERE TOO.
I'm guessing that her husband agreed with the contracter and she didn't, so she used your "love" for the tree as her reason for keeping it. And you almost blew her cover.
gordo, they are really nice people, and as neighbors go, very easy going.
deb,i had to think about it later before i realized what she was doing myself.
mother hen, i've been working on it! :)
mona, i thought maybe it was French Maid and The Paratrooper.
diane, well maybe i am. Actually, i am probably too cold-blooded to be a nudist.
tink, i know I would!
clowncar, how did you know?
scott, i like the tree too, it's a pretty one. I doubt it's a real cedar as it's more like a tall bush.
imez, dammit! I thought no one was looking when i buried that salesman there.
pat, you people are a bunch of perverts.
jen, Perfect! :)
gina, it sure did bug her that i didn't agree.
So very nice that somebody is looking out for your interests like that.
I say you host a drunken bash during which person or persons unknown cuts down said cedar tree/bush because something tells me that's what Mrs. Neighbor REALLY WANTS.
Came along from Imez's blog...
And I'm glad I did.
That's a cute post. So are you...really...glad she didn't take the tree down? ;)
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