Traveler's Blues

I was all set to announce my appointment as Illinois' new senator, to fill the position that Obama just vacated, but some legal and technical things came up so i had to withdraw my name. Saved me a BUNCH of money though.

Anyway,

The Mister is traveling again. A few weeks ago, he went away for two weeks, really really far away. This time he's just gone for 5 days.

I've always had a tough time when he's been away. I don't sleep well. I'm anxious. (Those of you who get anxious know that anxiety is a lot less pleasant than it sounds, and it doesn't sound pleasant.)

The anxiety is because i didn't trust him to not do something stupid, and a little because i was concerned about his safety. That is shitty of me to say, but it's the truth.

Back when we had a young child, it was harder to be the one at home. (The Mister found this out when i did a little traveling for work one year.) But now it's harder to be the one away. I'm home, in my own bed, surrounded by kitties and he's off staying in weird hotel rooms with other people's ass juice on the bedspread, eating crappy food and dealing with airlines.

With his being gone this much, and with the modern communication devices we have (did you know that you can text message someone in China?) it's really no big deal anymore, and i'm getting used to being here alone. In fact, i kind of like it. And in truth, it's almost annoying how many times a day he texts, IMs or calls me.

But i'll be glad when he's home. I just feel good that it doesn't bother me anymore. I feel stronger and more independent.

I told him this. I think it made him sad, a little.