Thursday, November 30, 2006

What's in store

I hate grocery shopping. I hate it so much that i do it every day. Pretty stupid huh? I make a list for that night's dinner and then i plan and execute a surgical stike on the store. It used to be that i planned and shopped for a whole week, but then our plans would change and food would get wasted.

The Mister likes to go to the store and stand around looking at the stuff in each aisle and ponder its usefulness. I have learned that it's best if we avoid shopping together because i am so impatient. I try hard to hide it, but sometimes it bursts through.

I try and think of my shopping habits as "European" in that i buy fresh ingredients every day, but really i'm just trying to spend as little time as possible absorbing the negative ions given off by the flourescent lighting in the store.

Of course it's fun to go to the store when i'm looking for pig uteri, but how often can i work that into a meal?

Yesterday i was at the store rushing around in my usual fashion, when this elderly lady on crutches (and pushing a cart) very sweetly asks me to get dog food off the high shelf for her. I did get it for her and then i couldn't just leave her there struggling with the cart and the crutches so i stayed by her side and helped her finish her shopping. I was on crutches once and now i really feel for anyone i see with them. Always hold doors open for people on crutches, it's a bitch to open a door and try to get through before the door smashes you in the ass and sends you sprawling. (Yes, i know this from personal experience.)

So much for my 30 second trip to the grocery store, but i did earn my good citizenship merit badge for the day, which i sorely need because my uniform sash is looking a little barren lately.


Julie Q. said...

On behalf of all people with crutches I say bless your fuzzy little heart! I think after I get this *%#@ cast off I'm going to be far more attuned to people who need a little help. Good for you.

Antonia Cornwell said...

I read your opening statement and thought how, how can you say that when your supermarket sells pig uteri and pu pu?? But then you gave the old pig bits a mention and anyway, I'm with you. I loathe and detest being dragged to the supermarket, and complain like a teenager when Ian makes me go with him. Actually, the only reason I had a baby was so I could stay home while Ian does the shop.

Lynnea said...

You are a saint. Saint Meno. I aspire to be you. Except I couldnt do my shopping every day, I would burn my grocery budget with little extras. I have to make a weekly menu plan and stick to the list, five people to feed and all...

Anonymous said...

I admire you for cooking fresh! I hate shopping, and dislike cooking when the consumers are thankless about the meal. But, I try to buy fresh and cook fresh because I live in the cancer belt, preservatives scare the hell out me, and fresh really does taste if I could just afford more fresh fish.

BTW what color is your uniform sash? I'd be happy to design you a badge.

Anonymous said...

go to the store every day? I would love it! I love to shop, for groceries, for clothes, for just about anything. I even like to hang out in office max, how sad is that?

I try to make a menu for the week, then a list, and go once a week. but somehow, I manage forget such and such, so I have to go back a couple of days later; or, I'll think of something else I HAVE TO HAVE right now, it can't wait until next week. I find, though, that by going every day, or even every few days, I spend more money than if I went once a week. this should tell me that I need to stop, right?

amusing said...

You don't hate shopping, you hate planning. I am incapable of planning because I hate cooking, hate food. I don't want to think about it. I don't want to spend my life in the kitchen like my mother seems to. I go every couple of days, by some sort of thing I can throw in a pan and call a meal and more often than not, I pick up the kids at 5:45 and the idea of cooking exhausts me and so we go out and I toss the ten dollars into the trash. (I've started thinking of the trays of chicken and beef as actual cash I'm wasting....)

thailandchani said...

I hate shopping, too! My blood pressure is probably through the roof from eating so many packaged, high sodium foods ~ but the idea of cooking each day makes me feel a bit sick. Target has a really great packaged Pad Thai. I'm addicted. Oops. :)

Good on you for helping that woman! But I do understand about getting hit in the ass. That's happened a few times with me in the same circumstances... and it was even funnier because I was helping someone in a wheelchair and at the time, I used a cane. Quite a sight, it was. :)



Anonymous said...

Hey, Hun. On book tour. Too tired to visit my fave blogs and write much more than a "Howdy-hey," like this.

Hugs and kisses.

Anonymous said...

Bwahahahahahaha!! Grass jelly! Bahahahah!!

Sorry. Had beer. Looking at a late night of designing.

Grass jelly!

Girlplustwo said...


i so WISH i could be european, and shop for fresh food every day.

ahem. it's frozen more than not lately.

urban-urchin said...

That was nice Meno. Wanted to mention you have a nice neck! (sigh- I am tired from work and my wierdness govenor is shut down for the evening- forgive me)

Marshamlow said...

I hate grocery shopping too! I try to give my husband lists as much as possible! Don't tell.

Anonymous said...

That was very sweet of you! I'm sure karma will pay you back in kind.

karmic said...

You are such a sweet soul. Sorta like *A*. The other day she decided to help out an eldery lady with her shopping. She got asked if she could do this everytime with her. :)
Good karma coming your way buddy!

Carolie said...

Badges for your sash, stars in your crown. Wish more people were like you, Meno.

meno said...

julie, once you get off the crutches, you will always be extra nice to people who are on them, because as you note, they *%#@!

antonia, that's the best reason i ever heard to reproduce. Good thinking!

maggie, no Saint me. I did help her but i was impatient inside. Grocery budget? But then again there are only 3 of us.

patches, i do it out of laziness more than preference. European is my way to try and sress it up a bit. And my girl scout sash is green.

holly, You like to shop? You are a strange woman! Actually you are probably the normal woman and i am strange.

amusing, you caught me, you are right. I just don't want to think about it. I sometimes go into the store and i still don't know what i'm going to do about dinner that night.

chani, too bad there isn't a video. Pad Thai, yum! Hey, thanks for the dinner idea.

holly c. Hey back! I hope it's going well. is it your book? should i buy it? ????????

nancy, sounds yummy doesn't it? Maybe if i was a cow that is.

jen, let me be clear, i shop on the days that i MAKE dinner, not on the days we order pizza or eat leftovers or have oatmeal for dinner.

u-u, there you are! I'll have to start paying more attention to my neck! There is no weirdness governor required here. Rage on.

marsha, i'll never tell, i send the Mister out a lot too. He doesn't mind it. Weird huh?

d-man, 'fraid it will take more than this for me.

hanni, i like to think so, but more likely i will end up on crutches with doors knocking me on my arse.

sanjay, I AM NOT SWEET! Stop saying that. Wah! That was nice of *A* though, and shows the hazards of being nice.

carolie, oh stop it, you're making me blush.

Bob said...

I wish we could shop "european" here in the states. But I'm afraid just going to Kroger or Safeway everyday doesn't count. Whether you get it there today and put it in the fridge for next week or if you buy it today to cook today, it is the same food. When we lived in Greece, there weren't huge chain stores and people didn't have the huge refridgerators that we do. So you drop down to the local market, get your meat cut from the carcass for that night's dinner and pick up a few seasonally fresh veg's. Bread is bought off of a truck that drives your neighborhood that was baked an hour or two before. No preservatives here. (the bread becomes hard as a rock by tomorrow, but damn it sure is good hot out of the truck.)

I also remember the flies buzzing around the carcasses that the roast was cut from and there was no refrigerated case for it to rest in.

Bless you for helping that lady. Especially because you were impatient inside. Putting others before yourself AND having to suffer for it earns extra karma points.

Princess in Galoshes said...

Pig uteri??? Did I miss something?

meno said...

hi bob, it's not really european when it's all wrapped in plastic and comes from 8 states away, that' just my excuse for being a bad shopper. That bread sounds wonderful.

princess, follow the link, if you dare!

Lucia said...

Yep, you're a saint and swell soul. Don't you just feel too damn nice sometimes??

Pauline said...

Those few moments of unselfishness will come back to bless you :)

Mother of Invention said...

She is so lucky she met up with someone like you who was willing to help. Most would have figured they had too much to do.

I can never think of 7 meals and buy whatever I need all at once. I go about 3 times a week...and I think I spend more that way!!

I don't really like cooking. I want meals on wheels!

meno said...

lucia, yeah. me. a saint. I'll alert the pope. I rarely feel too nice. Wonder what it would be like.

pauline, i just couldn't let her struggle on alone. And i can always use good karma.

MOI, but i did have too much to do, just nothing very important. Meals on wheels. I'm ready.

Andrea Frazer said...

Why is there never a Meno clone around when both kids are screaming for fruit rollups and the old lady from hell is putting a hex on me?

Anonymous said...

Yep, my book. It's: "Pumpkin Town!" I performed in 8 schools in 5 days. This coming week is half as hard: only 4 schools in 5 days.

Not complaining: I'm paid to make kids laugh.

meno said...

mamap, it's probably because you LOOK like you've got it all under control.

holly. wow. I am filled with awe. I mean it. Too bad Em is too old for that book. I need to find a young person to give it to.