Thursday, August 03, 2006

For a friend

I volunteer at a place that does counseling for kids. I do the initial interviews with kids or their parents so that someone who knows what they are doing can then assign the kid to an appropriate counselor.

Many kids are calling as part of a court ordered "diversion" process, which if completed will remove an MIP (minor in possesion) offense from the kid's record.

It's amazing how many kids tell me, when caught with drugs or paraphernalia, "i was just holding it for a friend". I mean, give me a break! I don't laugh too much at the kids, it's when their parents call and tell me the same thing, with the addition of "he's really a good kid, he just got mixed up with some bad people".

Hey, i grew up in the 70s and 80s, and so did many of these parents. We were using that excuse back then and it still stinks. You think they would have thought of something new by now, or at least that the parents would call bullshit.

Sometimes the kids get creative, and do come up with something new. So, in the interest of public service, i am going to list some of the excuses i've heard for other kids to use:

1.) "The dog threw up in my backpack. He must have eaten it on a walk."
2.) "It wasn't my backpack, my books were in it because a friend was carrying them for me." (A new twist on the old favorite.)
3.) "I thought that bag had my gun in it, not drugs." ( I swear, he actually said this.)
4.) "My mom gave me the pills." (Sadly, this might have even been true.)
5.) "I was in the park picking up bottles for my Boy Scout recycling project and one of them wasn't empty and a cop saw me." (This at 2 in the morning!)

Most of these kids really aren't hardened criminals or anything, but man, they'll say just about anything to aviod taking the blame. So far, excuse number 5 is my favorite, being as how it has the Boy Scout angle.

8 comments:

urban-urchin said...

Okay the gun comment scares me...

But really how different is this than what we (used collectively as I don't know about your past) did as teenagers? We just didn't get arrested.

Granted I grew out of the experimental stage while my brother didn't but that's a different thing altogether.

Kids think they're invincible and they do moronic things that can kill them, because they simply don't consider the consquences. I know this was me. I think that talking to your kids does help but I wonder how much?

meno said...

My first year of college i majored in dope smoking. But that was back when it cost $10 a bag, the THC content was low and the cops didn't care. If we walked around campus smoking a joint, the cops would stop us and tell us to cut it out.

There is a really big thing going on now with zero-tolerance. If a kid is even in a car with a six-pack in the trunk, they will get cited. If this had been the case when i was young, i would surely have been arrested more than once. I don't know if this is a good thing or not, but it does prevent cops from having to make judgements about each situation.

Some of these kids really are good kids, and were in a situation not of their own making. I just loved some of the creative excuses.

And i get to go home and tell my daughter about the hassle she would have to go through if she ever gets an MIP.

Marshamlow said...

I have a 15 year old daughter, "she is a good kid". No really. I doubt she would take her nose out of her books long enough to smoke pot, but you never know, for me 16 and 17 were very different than 14 and 15. Anyways, I wanted to say that her excuses for not doing chores, back talking, or staying up too late are all very similar to the excuses you listed. Meaning she seems to be incapable of saying, "sorry, my bad". Instead it is always a big story about how nothing is ever her fault. I wonder if that is some teenager brain thing?

Anonymous said...

I have a 15 year old daughter, "she is a good kid". No really. I doubt she would take her nose out of her books long enough to smoke pot, but you never know, for me 16 and 17 were very different than 14 and 15. Anyways, I wanted to say that her excuses for not doing chores, back talking, or staying up too late are all very similar to the excuses you listed. Meaning she seems to be incapable of saying, "sorry, my bad". Instead it is always a big story about how nothing is ever her fault. I wonder if that is some teenager brain thing?me teen

Anonymous said...

I have a 16-year-old son who is a really good kid. I mean really good, never gets in trouble, avoids kids that do get in trouble. NOTHING like my husband and I were at that age. The other night we were at my brother-in-law's house for pizza (4 blocks away from our house) and ran out of beer so we sent him over to our house to get some more in his car. He made it back just fine but I keep thinking about what idiots we were to send him. It just didn't occur to us at the time that, duh, 16-year-olds aren't supposed to have beer in their car. We are in no way irresponsible, nor were we drunk, just not thinking. I'm so glad he didn't get caught, but he would have been making an excuse that probably would not sound believable -- my parents sent me out for more beer.

meno said...

anon, thank god he didn't get stopped. Sometimes these situations happen with a kid, where it really isn't their fault. I can usually tell by the way the parents are there with him/her. But it's still a hassle for everyone concerned.

But "My parents sent me out for more beer" would have made me smile.

Anonymous said...

We have gotten so used to sending him out on errands since he recently got his license. At least we didn't send him out to get us some crack.

meno said...

anon- "At least we didn't send him out to get us some crack."

that made me smile!